Tell me, do you ever dread the incoming new year as it looms increasingly closer, especially during the week between Christmas and the 1st of January? You’re most certainly not alone.
I, for one, absolutely cannot get on board with the hype of “New Year” no matter how much I try. In fact, I actually stopped celebrating it a few years ago. New Year’s Eve, in particular, has always been a day of unbearable anxiety and anticipation for me. The pressure and expectations of the new year to come feel like a snare around my neck, tightening as the hours creep closer to midnight. It seems like everyone begins reflecting on their achievements for the ending year and discussing their goals for the incoming year, sharing them online for all to see (and fair enough to them for doing so - it’s absolutely okay to be proud of yourself, and wanting to improve yourself is great too), but that only makes me feel the need to hop on the bandwagon of inner reflection. And unfortunately, looking back on the year usually winds up in me realising there isn’t much to celebrate, at least from what I can see anyway. My bigger achievements are usually few and far between, and often happen by chance and opportunity, rather than things I actually set out to accomplish. The lack of these “big achievements” makes me feel like a failure, and those negative feelings of self-worth completely overshadow the smaller goals I’ve reached… meaning my year may have actually been very productive - just in smaller and more personal ways - yet I’m completely unable to see it.
See, I always feel the intense pressure to make the new year “count” - like I really need to set goals, just like everyone else, and I really need to achieve them, even at the cost of my mental and physical health. But it just isn’t realistic. The intensity of New Year and feeling pressured to set goals really infiltrates the rational side of my mind, twisting my thoughts until they become utterly irrational. At the end of 2024, I set myself some very loose goals, things I wanted to work towards with the intention that it wouldn’t be the end of the world if I didn’t achieve them, thinking it would be okay if they were just “loose” aspirations because the pressure to achieve them wouldn’t be as strong. Oh, how wrong I was! I should’ve known myself well enough to realise it just wouldn’t be that simple. Fast forward a year and I don’t think I’ve achieved even one of those loose goals! I was reflecting on this last week and feeling incredibly down on myself for it… and so the inevitable cycle just repeats itself every year, no matter how much effort I put into challenging my thoughts. I wonder if there’ll ever come a year where I don’t feel this way; a year in which I am able to truly listen to the rational side of my brain and ignore the pressures of the outside world.
And 2025 wasn’t even so bad, accomplishment wise! For starters, I designed and set up this entire website - that’s a pretty big deal! Secondly, at the start of the year, I was approached by the lovely Sighthound Savoy, who asked me if I’d like to illustrate their book (which is still in the works and something I’m incredibly excited to share with you in the future) - that’s a massive deal! And, looking more inwardly, I accomplished a lot of personal goals; tiny things which definitely wouldn’t be viewed as “achievements” in the eyes of a lot of people, but which meant a lot to me.
Wanting to improve yourself (so long as it’s a physically, mentally and emotionally healthy goal and achieved in a healthy way) is absolutely valid. When I used to make New Year’s resolutions or just generic New Year goals, I’d always try my best to keep them small and realistic - things as simple as wanting to read more books or actually make a start on writing that novel I’ve had stuck in my head for years, for example. However, over the last few years particularly, I’ve come to realise that setting resolutions and short-term goals just isn’t compatible with my brain… which may or may not correlate with my ADHD diagnosis… and consequently me learning how to unmask. With unmasking comes the reality of how exhausting daily living really is, and therefore, less time and energy is spent on improving, and more is spent on basic survival.
Something which I have been reflecting on, and something which actually is making me feel a lot better about my lack of motivation and productivity right now, is remembering that the modern “New Year” is just an invention; the true new year starts with the onset of spring. Thinking about it, January really shouldn’t be the start of the new year - it’s 100% counterintuitive, in the Northern Hemisphere at least. How can we be expected to emerge from the aftermath of Christmas, energised and ready to kickstart potentially life-changing ventures or pursue ambitious goals of self-improvement,, when the days are still incredibly short, the temperatures are below freezing, and nature is still resting and restoring itself. We as humans have been conditioned to forget that we’re also part of nature, and our bodies naturally react to the ancient rhythms of all living things. Therefore, we typically feel more energised in spring and summer, and more often than not, desire to rest and recharge throughout winter, just like wildlife - like hibernating animals, or those who simply go into a state of “torpor”. January should be a time of continued restoration, where one can maybe think about potential future goals without the pressure of needing to act on them right away. We should be using this time to prepare for spring, where the temperatures will rise, plants will start to bloom, new life will appear with the onset of many wild animal breeding cycles. It’s okay to not feel the drive or energy to resolve your life right now. It’s okay to wait for the right moment - the right moment for you in particular, whether that’s short-term or very much long-term - to emerge from the cold and dark winter, and start making progress to blossom into the person you wish to be, or the goals you want to achieve.
Restoration and recovery doesn’t - and shouldn’t - need to be rushed.
This is the advice I will be taking with me from now on. Granted, I know for a fact that no matter how rationally I think, nor how much I treat myself with kindness, sensitivity and compassion, I will likely always dread the approaching conclusion of the calendar year. However, I intend to try my absolute hardest to give myself more time to rest and recharge, and to not feel too bad on myself if I don’t achieve much within the year - heck, if I don’t even achieve much in a singular day for that matter! Because it’s 100% valid to rest and not be productive every single day of your life! If anything rest is actually productive in itself, for you’re allowing yourself to recharge in order to be more energised to tackle your goals later on!
With that being said, it’s now 2026 whether I like it or not - so I’m wishing you all a very happy and healthy new year, whether you’re already working on your aspirations for 2026 right now, or giving yourself time to rest and recharge first. I truly hope 2026 will be a positive year for us all.
My online shop’s processing and shipping times are now back to normal after the festive period, so rest assured that any orders will be sorted, packaged and posted promptly! Additionally, my commissions are still open for those who may be interested in purchasing a bespoke digital illustration or watercolour painting - please feel free to get in touch if you’re interested.
Speaking of illustrations, here’s my first piece of artwork of the year! I started sketching this up a few days ago, already with the intention of illustrating a snowy scene, only to wake up this morning and find that it had snowed overnight! Well, it’s only a very thin layer of snow in all honesty, but it’s quite nice that the illustration feels more relevant to the state of the weather right now. I think we should all feel inspired by the sleepy red fox in my illustration - allow yourself some time to rest and recharge this winter (at least when you’re able to). It was pretty fun to draw, although I must admit that illustrating a tired fox in the middle of a yawn made me yawn more frequently than I’d like to admit, haha!
My most recent illustration - the first of 2026 - titled: “It’s Okay to Rest”.
Thank you once again for all the support throughout 2025 - I’m so incredibly grateful, and while I’m currently using my January as a means of introspection and restoration whenever I’m able to, I’m also looking forward to seeing what 2026 brings, no matter how grand or “insignificant” it may end up being.
Until next time…!
Next Blog: 5th February 2026